slipofagirlI spend such an absurdly long time with my thoughts and fantasies, sometimes I’m a winner sometimes I’m a victim, perhaps this is why I don’t know myself well. I don’t think I do. What do I want? What do need? It’s all gets lost when I spend most my days living through the fantasies of others that have been present to me in a beautiful way. A warrior who fights for what’s “right”, a sullen girl too consumed by her pitiful love life, a confident seductress that takes what she wants, none of them are me. But yet it’s it so intoxicating getting lost in fantasies of a completely different life, the freedom of knowing that just by letting my thoughts run free I can be anywhere at any moment, that I’m never fully just myself in the moment. It has a strange allure to me, knowing I can disappear if just for a few seconds, I know I’m not really there, and I wouldn’t want to go , but the freedom to be there is what feels so special to me.
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