DiscoHotspotBoxingLeague

ring ring, lamellophone

I only deduct 1 star because I don't like it when I make eye contact with something able to see directly into my withered and raisin-like soul. But hey something's gotta patrol the cursed depths of Gaia's most fucked-up lake so I guess these guys took one for the team. Thank you Lake Baikal seal.

This anal wart was mistakenly granted a cosmic Make-A-Wish intended for somebody else, and as a result was transmogrified into an ostensibly human form on a temporary basis. The seraph responsible for this error has been demoted to "Port-A-Potty Goblin" duty.

This guy is up there with the panda vis a vis "top tier animal just because it tricked humans into starting task forces to make it better at having sex"

this dude sucks. Put him back in the jail

IMPORTANT this is a DIFFERENT THING than a "pubic library" but still pretty boss tbh

Also known as "Satan's pubic lice," the foul and mendacious drugstore beetle is a creature impervious to most poisons (hence the name), insecticides, and thoughts-&-prayers. It can be killed by prolonged freezing and/or overweening violence. It has the potential to host a parasitoid wasp which employs a sort of chestburster maneuver as a part of its reproductive strategy, but this wasp is not an efficient way of wiping out an entrenched drugstore beetle population. If you find an infested product in your pantry, don't just throw it away, but take out the trash immediately after you bag it up. Station UV-light sticky traps around the area to monitor for continued activity and follow up with a blood sacrifice to the plague deity of your choice.

Long Tall Sally is so misunderstood. The reason your college buddy "Shoeless Dave" had a trip during which he experienced 40 years as a ceiling fan and/or entered the Gnome Dimension against his will was because he made the rookie mistake of simply smoking this plant. If you don't want to endure the worst 5 minutes slash eternity of your entire life, you must either chew the leaves or brew them as a weak tea. This plant is legal to cultivate in most places simply because most people who misuse it never want to get near it ever again, and therefore its potential for prolonged abuse is negligible. If you get greedy, you will suffer. Also, never ever ever give Sally to someone who doesn't know the risks.

Ah, my good friend Ludovico, the 'Lude! Top tier when fresh but lethal when stale; would recommend for time travelers ONLY. Many pharmaceutical binders break down over time whilst the active ingredients remain potent, meaning that a lot of medications are more quickly metabolized in your body if you eat them after the thing officially expires (as it's only the timed-release controlling agent that expired), leading to rapid overdose. This is the case for both Quaaludes and many barbiturates. Stay safe, my friends.